The 1994 movie classic Dumb and Dumber chronicles the cross-country adventures of two good-hearted, but incredibly stupid friends. I have laughed about this movie since it came out almost 17 years ago and one of my favorite moments happens toward the beginning of the movie when Harry asks Lloyd how his workday was at the airport.
“Not bad. Fell off the jetway again,” Lloyd says.
I think of this often and giggle to myself, usually when I hear planes overhead or if someone I know is planning a trip.
Lately, I’ve thought of this quote in relation to North Dakota winters, but I’ve twisted it a little bit. There were two days this past week that if you had asked me how my day was, this would have been my response:
“Not bad. Got stuck in the drive-thru again.”
I was out and about on one of the most brutally cold mornings, which, as you know, we’ve had several, and I decided to treat myself to my favorite coffee beverage from a local coffee shop. I certainly wouldn’t have gotten out of my car for this – it was too cold. That’s how I ended up in the drive-thru.
The SUV in front of me left the speaker, started to pull up to the window and as he moved I saw the most incredible ice sculpture right there on the ground. It had huge mounds of ice coming up from the earth and two craters left from the numerous vehicles that pick up morning coffee. I saw this only after I stepped on the gas.
My eyes grew large, I took a deep breath and I felt my vehicle settle right in to an icy trap. I ordered the coffee and when I tried to move, of course, my wheels gave a good spin. By this time there were five vehicles behind me – I’m not kidding, I counted.
I made eye contact with the person in the vehicle behind me, as if to say, “Okay, I’m backing up now, don’t freak out.”
It seemed like forever but I managed to get myself out of the ice. I crawled up to the window, put my car in park and then I started sliding sideways. Yikes. Next time, I’ll go inside. No drive-thru lanes until spring.
I wish I had remembered that as I rushed around, running errands a few days later. My husband and I were packing to leave town, so I picked up food on the way home.
I entered another drive-thru, which was longer and much more confining than the last. The vehicles in front of me bounced along like organized bumper cars and then it was my turn to approach the window to pay.
It was not pretty.
My car jerked and jolted while the worker waited patiently for me to stop. At one point I thought certain that my car would slam in to the side of the building and I told her that.
“Don’t worry, there’s a little bumper down there, it would stop you,” she said as she took my money and handed me the food.
I looked down and saw a hard, concrete curb. Sure, that would have been great.
I don’t think it will take round three to convince me – no more drive-thru lanes. And I’ll probably avoid the jetways too, just to be safe.