You STOLE my Mountain Dew and you SLAPPED me with cheese! – Jessica N.
It is so cold out my body parts are falling off. – Jessica R.
This year, I just don’t care. I’d rather you be frustrated than me be frustrated. – Jessica N.
Alright, Sarah is bleeping hilarious. – Jessica R.
We knew this already. – Dan
(Like I wouldn’t publish this somewhere – Sarah)
I left my patience in 2013. – Jessica R.
People are running out of excuses for being stupid. – Dan
We will laugh about this in March. – Sarah
No – we won’t laugh until 2020. – Jessica R.
I have been attempting a very messy divorce from Google for years now. – Dan
Oh shut up, Siri. She’s such a jerk. She gets stupider with every incarnation. – Kelly B.
What’s a Type A personality? – Dad
Mom. – Sarah
Oh…got it. – Dad
It’s not worth brain damage, you don’t have to think that hard. – Megan
Some people have bad days…I don’t know what it’s like to be them. Intern Krista
Holiday decorating today and thankfully no one got electrocuted or fell off a ladder. P.S. John, I’m sorry I tried to stab you. – Sarah
I don’t think it’s fair for me to diagnose him as a sociopath. – Jessica R.
You can basically solve any problem with razor blades and Round Up – Megan
“…and Sarah is at a sandwich convention, whatever THAT is.” – Kelly B.
Here’s to a humorous and productive 2015!